Sizzlin'

My team wore the Intergalactic golf polos and won the Bristol Farms annual golf tournament at Industry Hills Golf Club at Pacific Palms. We looked good, we played good and we won! I can’t wait for next year’s tournament, which we will be wearing new team swagger at.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ If Confidence Had a Fabric, This Shirt Is It.

Listen… I’ve bought shirts before. I’ve even worn shirts before. But NOTHING — and I mean NOTHING — prepared me for the raw, unfiltered power of this Sunday Swagger Sizzling Polo. The moment I put on this pink, black-palm-tree masterpiece, I swear I heard a faint “damn right” whispered by the universe.

I walked out the door and instantly gained +47 charisma, +22 swag, and temporary immunity to embarrassment. My neighbor’s dog — who’s never respected me a day in his life — stopped mid-bark, tilted his head, and nodded like I had unlocked a new level of manhood.

But let me tell you the story that explains just how dangerously badass this shirt is.

The Day Everything Changed

I wore this polo to the grocery store. Just wanted some milk. Nothing fancy.

But this shirt had other plans.

The moment I stepped inside, the automatic doors opened before I even got there. I think they could sense the swagger.

An elderly lady in aisle four dropped her can of green beans, clutched her heart, and said, “Good heavens… that man’s sizzling!” EMTs arrived, took one look at the shirt, and asked me for a selfie.

A toddler pointed at me, turned to his mom, and said his first-ever word:

“Legend.”

Halfway down the cereal aisle, a dude tried to challenge me to a flex-off, but the reflection of my polo in the freezer doors blinded him temporarily. I apologized. He said it was an honor.

When I finally reached checkout, the cashier…